Second Position

I’ve finished 2 chemo sessions so far and I’m on my “RestWeek”..I don’t quite agree with that universal term describing the days following your infusions where your free to come and go as you please. The immediate days, 1 through 2 are not too bad. Nausea mostly but easily handled by one or 2 of the 11 bottles of pills and potions lined up. Day 3  the fatigue taps you on the head and says, ” Hey!!!! Remember me? There’s no going up and down stairs, making the bed or putting on makeup..nonononono I just wont have it.”  Fatigue is a profound feeling like I’ve never experienced. The act of simply raising your arms is monumental at times. I never ran a marathon, actually I never ran period. My people don’t run, we walk rapidly with an occasionally stumble..But, If I did, it probably feels like going for a second marathon 5 minutes after completing your first.  Day 5 through 7 of rest of said “rest week” I start to feel normal again..Day 8 is when your gut catches up with the fact that your trying to kill it and it doesn’t quite care for that. It reacts violently and without mercy regardless of how nice you were to it in the past with probiotics, vegan yogurt, $10 kale smoothies and lactose free milk..It’s mad and there’s no apologizing to it. It hums the theme song to GilligansIsland if you try…

This was the week I also lost my beloved grey silver and black curls that took a year and a half to culture. The loss wasn’t gradual by any means. One shower=no hair left..OK, I knew it was coming but to have it in your hands really sucks..Lucky for me, Dr. Schmoopy to the rescue!..His nimble pre-surgical head shaving hands made quick work of it for me, himself and Isaac..If we sit together we look like a nest of Peregrine Falcon Chicks…A good friend of mine is also having her own journey with chemo and realized today her beautiful curls, admired by many are on the outs…We just looked at each other with not too much to say…

Second position is known as ‘ The Jumping Jack That Never Jumped Back”  It provides a wider base for pliés and also serves as a transition between steps. This position was always the easiest for me to do correctly. I spent many days perfecting my second position because it gives your legs some breathing room, so prized by the woman of my HaploGroup H11 1b…. This position is similar to my “rest week”. It gives me breathing  room to tackle the beast waiting for me next Monday.



6 Replies to “Second Position”

    1. Sending you love & hugs. It all really sucks. I’m sorry I can’t find more eloquent words than that. But really, your words describe what you’re experiencing so well. And I know there are more. Keep expressing. Xo


    1. yea, when you know it’s coming I guess it softens the blow but my hair had a life of its own the last year and seeing it in my hands was weird. Glad you like my story Joaner💋


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